what happens when im gone?

sorry to say.
random..


but i feel lack of care & concern from th person i need.
from th person i love, my families.

Its my body, i know.
I wasnt feeling well nowadays.
I donno wads wrong. But i feel weaker and weaker.
I put on a strong front. But im not.

Is dere any sickness or smth?
Having fever on and off for weeks alrdy.
Flu and cough,
bloated stomach.
And v painful

Now my waist feel so uncomfOrtable too.
Every part of my body is gett worst.
Mmmm, do i need to see a doctor??
But unless i admitted to th hospital lying on th bed, else they are not gonna care for me i guess.

Not asking how am i feeling today.
Or whatsoever,
I don wish to complaint how painful itis. Esp when im sleeping at night.

Sighs..

Im not afraid of getting sick, jus feeling lack of concern from th person i need?

They used to.. Care for me..
My parents used to.. My loves one used to..

Okay im not saying that they are not good or whatever. Its jus random. Thats what i think.
I feel tat no one cares abt me.

Even a text saying, are you okay? Also don have.

Mmmmm.
Finishing work soon. V xinku now. My temperature is going up. Agrhhhhh......!

Sighs

Byebye.


Anw, i miss u so much my dear.
I wan you to hug me to reduce th coldness like now?
I wan you to talk to me and make me smile.
But u seems so busy in everywhere.
Even on th phone is also hard

Its actually better not to hope for anything. At least end of th day u will get suprise. But sometymes, we jus wished some good things might happen, and we autoly look forward.
But end up nth comes ...

And so we got disappointed.


After what i have been thru, my mindset has change.

But i donwan to say what has change.. Slowly you will notice..

Its tired to think abt what is gonna happen next. Why not wait and see. Den deceided.

Don care weather im able to take it anot. Jus accept it.

im not deceiving myself.. Anymore.

I kept quiet dosen mean im lying to myself.
I accept th facts but don choose to voice them out.

Oh my, has been sleeping with baby from friday night untill now. ..
Wonder how to sleep without baby tonight. ):

Somehow u are jus so addicttive.

I love you so so much.
More den what i cud think of.

Jus felt tat u are my first love. And gonna be my last.

U gave me th power to strike. To hold th world jus for u,.

Baby, u are my everything.